All these books talk about setting boundaries, when to say yes, when to say no etc, but the thing that no one ever talks about (and maybe it will in this book - I'm not that far into it) is that the people who grew up being able to push over people's boundaries (their parents did not set good limits probably) do not like being told no. These are often people in charge, in power. And when you set your limits, they react. The hardest part for me is knowing how to set the limits in a way that is respectful. In most situations I've been in, when I set a boundary, it does not move to a more respectful place. In business I have found you pretty much have to do what they want if you want to work for them. I mean there is some room for polite negotiation, to be sure. And the good thing: you can choose who you work for.
One of my favorite quotes I've heard is paraphrased that you have in your life exactly what you put up with. It's very, very true. The key is figuring out how to create your life and relationships around you to be positive and healthy without just pissing everybody off. We either give in too much and resent it, or speak up too much and make people mad. Where is the in-between?? I guess that depends on having relationships and friendships with mature people who care enough to listen, respect, and even dare to disagree! To say what they feel and think! I tend to assume everyone thinks like this, so I speak my mind more than I probably should, and I'm learning it is not always the best idea. However I am blessed to be able to have friends that are like this.