messengers from the night

A bee on a false indigo flower, Mississippi
Copyright (c) 2000 Wendee Holtcamp

My son just came in from playing outside on the cul de sac with his friend.

"Mom, there's ths HUGE moth outside! Come look at it!"

"Is it a Luna moth?" I ask, knowing we see a lot of them here.

"No, come look!"

So we walk down the street to our neighbors yard and there is a big brown moth, about the size of a Luna (which is about 4 or 5 inches across) with spots on its wings. Next to it is a piece of a wing of the same species.

"I don't know if that is one of its wings? It seems like it has all 4 of its wings. Maybe it's another one?" Sam says.

"I think it's a shed wing," his friend says.

"I think that is probably the wing from another moth, probably its mate. A lot of times moths mate, and the female lays her eggs and then she dies. Is it dead?"

"No it was moving, walking across the grass a little bit ago."

I poke at it a bit, and it wiggles. "I think it's dying. I think it's on its last leg."

I go back inside and Sam follows, bringing in the extra part of the other wing to put on his bookshelf. He heads back and outside, then comes running into the house not one minute later.

"Guess what?! Mom! While I was inside, T (his friend) saw a cardinal eat the moth! It just ate it right up! One second it was there, and the next it is gone!"

A friend of mine has a book, "Animal Speak: The Spiritual & Magical Powers of Creatures Great & Small" by Ted Andrews and she tells me the meaning of some of the animals I come across. Nothing specifically about the moth, but it reminds me of a harbinger of the night. Night represents darkness. And the appearance of the night-creature in the day is interesting, especially since I've had a real nightmare of a struggle of a month. It's not a nightmare like some people I know of going through real and serious struggles, like the death of a spouse, or cancer, or serious illness or loss. But in the midst of my pretty darn good life right now there has been some incredibly intense struggle. A struggle to make a decision and to know God's will and to know my own heart and mind and just general struggle and mild depression rendering as lethargy and lack of motivation. Back and forth. Struggle. I'm ready to be free and happy.

The cardinal represents "Renewed vitality through recognizing self-importance" and "To remind us to add color to your life, and remember, everything you do is of importance." It's interesting that the cardinal came and ate up the harbinger of night.

So tonight is yet another girl's night out - this time to celebrate Stinky's birthday TODAY and my birthday Sunday! We're going to have $2 margaritas at this Tex Mex place around the corner we went to the other night. And then this weekend I'm taking the kids to Sea World!