Wednesday, February 13, 2008

a blessed day

I had an awesome day! After the crazy stress of the "nightmare day" I'll share a good story! I had a lazy morning with a phone call from my elderly friend Carmine telling me about the beautiful snows there in Ohio, and then was supposed to have lunch with a friend/colleague at 1230. He called at 1220 and thought we'd agreed to meet at 12, but I remember very clearly because the 1215 was "15 minutes early" so we could take his car down! So, he was irritated, I could tell, so I said do you want to reschedule? He hesitated but said no, let's go ahead.

So I got downtown and his directions were wrong, so I called and was like I'm on this street, where do I go? He got irritated and goes, "Wendee, calm down, you need to pull over and let me give you directions," kind of sternly, so I was like, that's kinda rude, so I said, "look I think you sound stressed and it's stressing me out so why don't we just forget it for today." He said "You're right, ok. [Pause] Bye" and hung up the phone. And immediately I thought, well that's that.

So you'd think that might have upset me, but I really wasn't upset at all, which was part of the reason it is such a cool day - to not get emotionally riled. So there I was in Minute Maid Park parking lot so I called a few friends to see who might be able to meet for lunch since I was already down there. I have a bunch of friends who live "downtown" (I call anything out of the 'burbs where I live "downtown"). Within 5minutes I chatted briefly with like 4 friends, which was nice in itself - and one had a baby THAT MORNING! (his wife was in the hospital so he couldn't get away for lunch) but I ended up going over to see my friend David from Rice grad school who has a 18-mo baby boy who I'd never seen yet! The boy was so adorable but the second he saw me he started crying!!! LOL. I mean, he took one look at me and just started crying and ran to his daddy! Most babies like me :) David said he is never like this! Maybe it was my pony tails?!

David and I went to Mi Luna which is one of my favorite restaurants in Rice Village and had some Spanish Tapas. I'm STILL full! Yummy! And by then baby boy was all happy again. So while having a wonderful lunch talking about Christianity and religion and relationships and life (David is an atheist) and first I got a text message from the other person and then he sent a really insulting email - 3 copies of the same one in fact. Two identical and then one with a FW in the subject so I guess he really wanted to make sure I got it!

Let's see, he called me "insulting, rude and selfish not to mention irrational." and "I'm sorry but that little snapshot spoke volumes about your personality and character." This is from an almost complete stranger!!

LOL! I mean, seriously!! I look at myself with fairly clear view of my strengths and flaws, but with absolute honesty, I was not insulting, I didn't curse, or yell or raise my voice at him in ANY way! His out of proportion response of his is so ludicrous that it makes me laugh when I read it! I was mildly flustered due to his incorrect directions, and his already obvious frustration to the time mix-up (whatever happened to patience?) and was then trying to ask him directions so I could find the right street in the one-way craziness that is downtown. I did not "yell" - and trust me, I know! I was just trying to get a quick answer so I could turn while driving without getting rammed because downtown can be crazy insane with all the one way streets. Regardless, why send out such a mean email? No one's perfect, but when I got the email I was like, whatever dude!

I've seen people project their own stress (or how previous relationships acted) into others' actions so I can maybe understand him thinking I was getting upset when I was just trying to get going the right way. But the fact that HE felt compelled to send me both the rude text and this email says a lot. What's the point? At one point in my life I might have done the same thing but I've learned (am learning) often it's wisest to just let it go. Why waste the energy? Why hurt people's feelings? If one really has something negative and critical to say, it's best couched in love, especially as a Christian, which he is. Anyway I have no idea why this situation made me happy other than seeing that this negative stimulus did not upset me. I think (I hope) it's that increasingly I'm drawing my confidence comes in knowing that I am fully and deeply loved by God, and not perfect but forgiven, and also have so many amazing friends who have the traits of Christ (including those who are not Christians) - forgiving, patient, kind...

I also have decided that if I reply at all to this guy it will be to apologize and to acknowledge any of my part in the situation, and maybe encourage him to know that I also forgive him - because the Lord says to bless those who curse us. I choose to take the "best spin" which is, he's probably under a lot of stress and having a bad day. He's not a bad person, and I even would consider working with him and starting over possibly IF he could be humble enough to admit his flaws (because that is the most charming trait to me!).

OK so anyway, then as I was driving home I was just listening to music and felt so happy. Then I got home and get this! I got a Valentine's card from God! :D Remember, yesterday I told the story of the woman speaker who lamented not getting celebrated when her hubby did, and I related because as a single mom I don't get "celebrated" too much. Well one year she said she got this b-day cake from this great cake shop sort of randomly, she told us, "You may get a birthday cake from your family but I GOT A BIRTHDAY CAKE FROM GOD!" which was really cute and funny. So today I got a Valentine's Card from my pastor and his wife, and they wrote, "You are such a delightful woman of God. We love you!" And I just felt so happy. And I thought, You may get a Valentine's Card from your spouse or partner, but I GOT A VALENTINE'S CARD FROM GOD! :) It just made me happy. And then I also got a check in the mail - and that is always a happy day!!

Oh and earlier on the way home I stopped by the kids' school and got hugs from the kids and a hug from Savannah's best friend who called me "Aunt Wendee" and said "because you're nicer than my real aunt!" ;) She had never said that before, and she wasn't a kid who often hugged me either so it was very cute and sweet. :) Blessing on blessing - my cup runneth over.

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